Hard Words Part Three: Speak
Some people, on the other hand, are not nearly as fond of talking as I am. They would rather "remain quiet and be thought a fool than to open their mouths and remove all doubt." (That's a great quote attributed to many people!)
But regardless of the amount of words you say or the confidence with which you say them, we, as children of God, are supposed to reveal God with our words. And THAT is where we all struggle.
It's so much more than what we should not say. We should not use words that are spoken to harm. We should not use words that are filthy in any way. We should not use words that seem funny but are just plain mean deep down. We should not say things to make ourselves look smart or witty or great. The Bible tells us we should let no corrupting talk come out of our mouths (Ephesians 4:29) and we should not to speak any careless words (Matthew 12:36). We are to put away anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk (Colossians 3:8).
Some people consider what not to say and think, "Well, then, I'll just have to keep my mouth shut." Sorry, but that doesn't work, either. Consider these words of King David: "So I remained utterly silent, not even saying anything good. But my anguish increased;my heart grew hot within me" (Psalm 39:2-3).
So what DO we say?
Well, for starters, start with this promise from God:
"I, the Lord, am your God, Who brought you up from the land of Egypt; Open your mouth wide and I will fill it" (Psalm 81:10). Now the immediate implication of this verse is that we need to trust God to give us what we need. He brought the Israelites out of Egypt and gave them manna and quail and water in the desert. He filled their mouths and their stomachs. But I have often used this verse as a prayer when I didn't know what to say! "Lord!" I might whisper, "My mouth is open wide to speak; but please fill it with your words!"
So we let God give us the words to speak. He does this through His Spirit: "The Holy Spirit...will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you" (John 14:26). And the Spirit is quenched if we're not living according to His leading. So if you're wondering why God doesn't give you the words to say when you need them, check your heart and your mind and your obedience. The Spirit will clam up if you're not going to listen.
Next, we've got to let God be the watchman for our words. Picture a large city back in Old Testament times, surrounded with an immense wall with only one gate for coming in and out. As you can imagine, that gate was the center of all military focus. That gate was how people came in and out but it was also how their enemies would come in. So we use David's words again as we pray, "Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips" (Psalm 141:3).
The third step, and this is where I struggle most greatly, is to pause and let our heart and our brain analyze our words before we speak them. There have been times that words have left my mouth and I would think, "Where in the world did those come from? I didn't even think them before I spoke them!" Well that's wrong. Obviously the brain thought them, but I sure didn't filter them through the truth of God's Word before they left my mouth. James 1:19 tells us that "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry," meaning that we've got to get our brains involved in our words. And I don't just mean your intellect; I mean the part of your brain that knows God, believes Him, and chooses to obey Him.
Next, we speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). Many of you have heard me tell you this. If you can't speak truth, DO NOT SPEAK. There is no room for lying or falsehood of any kind in the mind of a child of God. Don't bend the truth, stretch the truth, or give an account of something you're pretty sure is right but don't know. On top of that, we speak only in love. So even if you are bound and determined to say something that is 100% true but is hateful, you should not say it. Wait until the anger passes and your emotions chill out. Ask God to fill you with His love for her. Never say something in anger or in the heat of an argument. TRUTH. IN LOVE.
We've come to the last, and quite possibly most difficult step: Speak what you believe. Now, you're going to do that whether I tell you to or not, because the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart (Luke 6:45). Often, we realize that we don't really believe what we think we believe because our words reveal something entirely different. But in every conversation, in every discussion, in every debate or argument or encouragement or conversation, our focus on God will keep our words in line with His Word. Yes, it's tough. Yes, it's something you've got to work on. Yes, it takes a while to do it correctly.
But speaking correctly will come out of believing correctly. So don't focus on what to say; focus on what you believe.
What do you believe about God? Jesus? the Spirit?
What do you believe about the Bible?
What do you believe about how we are supposed to treat others?
What do you believe about Jesus' death and resurrection?
What do you believe about God's purpose and plan for your life?
Do you believe God loves you? Unconditionally? Forever?
Do you believe God all-powerful? All-knowing? Eternal?
How does God describe you in His Word? Do you believe it?
It's not a problem with your mouth. It's a problem with your heart. And if you don't know the answer to these questions, you've got a mouth problem that flows out of your belief problem.
When you believe God is who He says He is and that you are who He says you are, your mouth will follow.
Make the prayer of the man in Luke 9:23-24 your prayer: "I do believe! Help me overcome my unbelief!" Find the answers to those questions in God's Word. Ask Him to help you believe them.
He will.
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